How to Deal with a Micromanaging Boss

Imagine watching a puppeteer manipulating an inanimate object for a show, except that show represents your professional life and the puppeteer is your boss. Isn’t it upsetting?

Having a micromanager as a boss can be a source of stress and frustration as it impacts your day-to-day life.

A micromanager tries to control every aspect of the work, no matter how small the detail can be. Employees can feel distrusted, dissatisfied, and disrespected. Prolonged control over all the aspects of an employee’s work may negatively affect his or her wellbeing and productivity. Quitting can be seen as a viable option if the employee can no longer deal with the situation.

However, it does not have to be this way!

#1: IDENTIFY THE TRIGGERS

Trying to understand the triggers for your boss’ micromanagement can help you be better equipped to deal with the situation. Start by identifying the reasons why he or she micromanages.

Often, micromanagers do not realize what they are doing. Perhaps, your boss micromanages because he is under a lot of stress, or he has a terrible experience with the previous employee.

Experts say that micromanaging can also be rooted from a personality trait. Individuals with strong organizational tendencies find it difficult to delegate tasks to others. These people find it hard to trust someone else to do the job as well as them, or to complete a task within their expected timeframe.

#2: ASK WHERE YOU CAN IMPROVE

Being polite and direct will serve you best. Ask your boss about the areas that you can improve on to address the company’s needs.

You can also be open about how your boss’ management behavior makes you feel by providing specific examples.

After sharing your thoughts on your intention to improve the collaboration and support, advise your boss that you are most productive when you are given the autonomy to meet those needs. You can also set weekly check-ins to alleviate the hovering.

#3: PROVIDE UPDATES REGULARLY

Micromanagers want to be in control. They want to check-in on your work to make sure that things are going smoothly to the schedule. Since micromanagers cannot do everything by themselves, they do their hardest to stay as involved as possible.

Try being proactive when sending regular updates before your boss has a chance to ask for these from you. List the things you want to accomplish within the day and email it to your boss. Regularly sending updates can serve multiple purposes.

Firstly, your boss knows exactly where your current workload stands. Questioning can be minimized. Secondly, your boss will realize how detail-oriented you are and that you can manage your own responsibilities without intervention. Lastly, it can help your boss address immediate concerns at one glance, which can reduce frequent check-ins.

#4: BUILD CONNECTION AND TRUST

Do you agree that trust is the key to any healthy relationship? Be it personal or professional, trust can build a solid foundation for you and your micromanaging boss.

When your boss does not trust your decisions and abilities, he or she will always monitor you. Developing synergy and building trust by creating time to connect and sharing what you are currently doing can help your situation. This allows your boss to create a space for growth.

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Shifting your micromanaging boss’ leadership style is not easy, and change is not immediate. As an employee, you can show your boss that you are trustworthy and responsible to inspire that change over time.

Sources: 1, 2, & 3

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How to deal with a micromanager professionally

colleagues at work

Micromanagement is such a pain in the arse. At a point in our careers, we might have been faced with a micromanager some time, somewhere. But many out there may not even know that they are being micromanaged.

So what are the common signs of micromanagement? Here are eight common ones from such bosses:

  • Little or no work delegation
  • Always asking you for updates
  • Show a reluctance in mentoring
  • Finding fault in everything you do
  • Famous for one-way conversations
  • Sole decision-maker even for the littlest of tasks
  • Like to focus on the small details but miss out on the big picture
  • Delay project deadlines because everything requires their “yes”

If you suspect that you’re whirled up in such a situation and it’s taking a toll on you, act on it before you explode.

Here are some ways to deal with a micromanager (or colleague) tactfully. Fictitious names included!

#1: Have an honest heart-to-heart talk
coffee conversation

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As a micromanaging superior, Peter might not be very welcoming of criticisms. Be sensitive when dealing with this. When we say to have an honest heart-to-heart talk, we mean a candid but specific conversation.

Bill Gardner, founder and managing partner of Noetic Outcomes Consulting, suggests this with over 40 years of experience coaching executives. You want to describe your feelings when Peter’s behaviours directed at you make you feel X, Y, and Z. Then, go ahead and list some specific actions you hope to see going forward.

Now, some of you must be thinking this is impossible. As Asians, we may not like to confront head-on. But grow some guts, and you never know positive outcomes could snowball out of your truthfulness.

#2: Be direct with your requests
young-businessman-and-businesswoman-sitting-outdoors

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During your conversation with a micromanaging boss, you want to be direct with your requests. Ask Sally what you can do better to address her needs. Even if she responds with a “but you’re already doing well”, don’t stop there.

Share with Sally your intention of improving collaboration with her. If you’re the sort that requires time and space to prove your work capabilities, let Sally know.

Instead of her chasing you for updates as and when she pleases, take the initiative by scheduling weekly check-ins. This can become your silent way of saying, “Please stop checking in for information outside of our scheduled meetings.”

#3: Ask questions to understand their point of view
an asian woman asking questions at a business meeting

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When you’re pulled into a project meeting, don’t just let John do the talking and then complain about him during lunch hours. To attempt to make your life a little better, you want to understand your manager’s perspective.

To do so, ask questions.

Katharina Schmidt from the Forbes Coaches Council shares that these questions might guide you towards a better working relationship:

  • What are your deal breakers?
  • What are your success hypotheses?
  • What are your key objectives for this initiative?
  • How, and how often, do you want to be informed?
#4: Focus on behaviour and impact
two-business-people-wearing-face-masks-while-discussing

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When having any conversations with Zelia, you want to avoid the “m” word – that is, “micromanaging”. What you can do is to focus on the behaviour and impact it has on you.

For example, Zelia’s need for constant updates on your progress is one such behaviour that has impacted you. Let her know that these updates are taking extra time off your productivity and attention on your urgent projects at hand.

See if both of you can negotiate an alternative solution to that. Maybe setting a fixed time for updates can help you better manage your working hours?

Don’t be afraid to offer new ideas.

#5: Identify your superior’s end goal
Two young businessmen discussing new project

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Conflicts often arise when two people are not on the same page. To stand on the same ground as Raju, you want to align with his end goal. April Armstrong, CEO of AHA Insight, notes the power of the “then what” question.

Ponder over these:

  • After I complete this assignment, what happens next?
  • If this were to be a big success, what would the ideal outcome be?

When your destinations are in line, Raju may see you in a different light. It can also prompt him to release his grip on his control over you and your teammates.

#6: Keep your eye on the curveballs and overdeliver
asian woman drinking coffee while working in a cafe

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For folks currently facing your first micromanager in your job, the whole experience can be daunting. But don’t waddle in the toxicity and put yourself at risk of being sour over it.

Understand that micromanagement is often a result of these two reasons:

  • The fear of being disconnected leads Carrie to find out as much as she can through countless updates like reports, meetings, and one-on-one conversations.
  • Carrie finds it difficult to transit from a position of doing to a trusting and coaching managerial position.

Jill Hauwiller, the founder, principal consultant, and lead executive coach at Leadership Refinery urges us to find out what our manager values and wants. Anticipate the unexpected and overdeliver on your promises.

This is because even if you can’t change their micromanaging behaviour at the end of the day, you have your great results to back you up. Your successful work output is something no one can take away from you.

Put on a little smile
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Remember our recent article on “Strategies on how to cope with someone you dislike at work”? When working with people you find difficult working with, communicating your points across calmy without being defensive is essential.

Jeff Altman, a career coach from The Big Game Hunter, said that smiles and laughter often go a long way toward making a point with people. So put on that big, friendly smile before you enter into any discussion with a micromanager.

Career and people skills take time and deliberate effort to develop. Don’t quit your job on impulse.

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