5 points to note if you have a loved one with OCD

OCD behaviour

Living with OCD, or an obsessive-compulsive disorder referred to by medical professionals, is hard on both the person who has the condition and their loved ones.

The uncontrollable patterns of behaviour, the painful loops of repetitive motion, and the systematic thought cycles that derail successful functioning in people’s daily lives can be a real challenge.

If you have a loved one in your life who’s struggling to live with OCD, keep these things in mind as you continue to comfort and support them.

#1: Avoid excessive criticism

OCD tends to make your brain relive specific encounters, whether positive or negative, over and over again.

These thought loops can become oppressive to the point of exhaustion, mainly when one is focusing on negative thoughts and memories. Try to avoid giving critiques and criticisms to people with OCD. This will ensure your harsh words won’t play on repeat in their heads.

#2: Shine no unnecessary light on their routines
a person washing hands

Image Credits: The Jakarta Post

One of the most noticeable components of OCD is specific obsessions or compulsions that a person affected by the condition might need to repeat. For example, checking the switch three times to make sure it’s off or washing their hands every other hour.

These rituals are often unavoidable and can be a source of anxiety for your loved one if they don’t do them. Therefore, try not to draw attention to their actions when it happens. Simply wait patiently until they’re able to move on to the following routine.

#3: Don’t force them to stop a ritual

Speaking of repetitive actions, don’t try to force your loved ones to hit the “stop” button on their repetitious acts. Their disorder is uncontrollable at times, and if you do, it will add to their distress.

Forcing them to move through without completing a ritual or behaviour pattern can make their urge to do it even more severe. This can exacerbate further potential emotional problems, so remember to be patient and let them move through life on their terms.

#4: Be patient when correcting
silhouette of a couple

Image Credits: unsplash.com

When you’re helping someone with OCD do something, whether it’s for the first time or correcting their action, it helps to be incredibly patient.

OCD can require a series of behaviours or loops before a new action makes its mark. So, your loved ones may need to repeat some soothing behaviours before they can heed your correction and accept it.

Be patient and let them work through their feelings until they’re ready to listen to what you have to say.

#5: Show your support without enabling

Being supportive is genuinely one of the best things you can do to assist a loved one suffering from OCD. The condition can be an incredibly isolating experience that convinces the sufferer that they are dealing with it alone and singularly responsible for living with and treating it.

However, know the difference between supporting and enabling. It would be best if you were not answering their recurring questions all the time or buying more hand soap to facilitate their routines.

Consider this phrase or come up with your own, “‘It looks like you’re having an obsession and asking me to participate, but I’m not going to do that because I’m on your side, not OCD’s.”

Final thoughts
grayscale photo of a person's right hand

Image Credits: unsplash.com

A person with OCD may, at times, do something that seems ridiculous to an average person. For example, they may suffer from an intense fear of sin and feel the urge to “confess” to someone even if they’ve just accidentally brought home a paper clip from the office (true story).

As we’ve shared in this article, remember to hold back on your criticisms even when you feel the urge to correct them. Most people with OCD are aware of their condition, so there’s no need to spotlight their routines or, worse still, force them to stop.

They need your support and positive feedback, not your mindless judgements.

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Engagement ring inspirations for your upcoming proposal

Engagement ring inspirations

For a woman looking forward to being engaged, there’s almost nothing better than the excitement that a beautiful engagement ring can bring.

With the symbolic meaning a ring carries, it has to be as perfect as it can be. That’s why the process of choosing an engagement ring must be taken seriously.

As usual, every prospective bride wants to see the three Cs in their engagement ring, namely carat, clarity, and cut. However, it’s crucial that the ring also keep up with the year’s latest trends and stay fashionably classy throughout the years.

Some fashion statements can fall out of style, and an engagement ring must be able to match various accessories and outfits for a stylish and sophisticated look.

That’s why we’re here to share with you some elegant engagement ring inspirations for your upcoming proposal this year.

#1: Black Diamonds
rose gold black diamond ring

Image Credits: alexisrussell.com

Move aside, classic diamond. The black diamonds are now up and coming. This is due to their striking nature and the mysterious and cool, edgy vibes it carries.

The engagement ring can stand out even more if it’s set in a bold yellow or rose gold colour, which offers a step away from the traditional diamond ring approach. 

#2: Halo Rings
hexagonal halo ring

Image Credits: whowhatwear.com

One of the top emerging trends of 2021 is halo rings that have a hexagonal or octagonal shape. 

It creates the perfect balance between preserving the essence of timeliness but also adding that element of uniqueness. No longer are purely traditional rings a must-need if you’re planning to propose this year.

Those searching for a beautiful ring without being too “bridal” can consider this design.

#3: Colourful Stones
Teal sapphire engagement ring

Image Credits: capucinne.com

When you think of proposal rings, you might imagine the classically cut glimmering diamond. 

However, you can slowly replace that idea with the new trend of colourful stones. Specifically, teal-coloured sapphire is a stone growing in popularity, creating an ideal blend of blue and green shades.

Because these stones are on the rarer side and not alike, they make for a ring that’s entirely one of a kind and precious to the bride who wears it. 

#4: Mixed Diamond Cuts
Mixed Diamond Cuts

Image Credits: reebonz.com

Sometimes, trends can work backwards by capturing the looks that give off an antique or vintage feel.

This specific trend involves mixing different diamond cuts, like tapered baguettes combined with rounds, epaulettes, or bullets. It encompasses the well-known art-deco design but adds a modern-day twist to make it an exceptional diamond engagement ring.

Plus, if you’re environmentally conscious, incorporating existing stones into a single ring allows for plenty of upcycling. 

#5: Remodelling
remodelling diamond rings

Image Credits: pinterest.co.uk

Even though an engagement ring by itself is already meaningful, it can be made even more special by incorporating existing stones that carry a sentimental value.

Across the board, more and more jewellers encounter clients who’ve inherited jewellery and want it to be remodelled into a specific shape or form into their engagement ring.

It’s a fabulous way to make an engagement ring even more personal to the modern-day bride holding on to traditions.

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Fundamental Rules Of Budgeting

As you gloss over the pages of old personal finance books, you will realize that they stress on the importance of creating a budget and sticking to it. Poof! All your financial problems will be solved in a snap. However, life is not as simple as that.

Budgeting is the process of creating a financial plan based on your estimated revenue and expenses over a period. It is a complex task that takes your entire financial profile into account. It is up to you to embrace the process!

On that note, here are the fundamental rules of budgeting.

#1: BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF

Awareness of how much money comes in and how much you spend will enable you to pinpoint your spending habits. Be honest with yourself! You will be surprised that everything adds up, once you keep track of your money on a regular basis. Start by writing down your expenses for a week and continue. Include your daily coffee runs and Netflix subscription. You can use online budgeting tools to help you monitor your money.

#2: BE PREPARED TO CHANGE

The only permanent thing in this world is change. Your efforts of controlling your environment will be put to waste because change is inevitable. If you reached the end of the month and noticed that you are struggling to pay bills, something needs to change. Alter your budgeting strategies and identify which categories you can cut down on. Fortunately for you, small changes can make a big difference.

Your income, expenses, and priorities will change over time. You must adjust your budget accordingly.

#3: LEARN SELF-CONTROL

Within my immediate social circles, my partner is the primary model for self-control. He steers away from luxury and focuses on strategies that make him a savvy spender. He practices delayed gratification too. Learning self-control can help you accomplish your realistic budget.

If you are lucky, your parents or teachers taught you this skill when you were a child. If not, you will learn the importance of delaying gratification. Despite the tempting nature of credit cards, it is better to wait until you have saved up the money for a purchase. You do not want to spend the rest of your years paying for your credit cards alone!

#4: USE CASH WHEN NEEDED

Notice your spending habits. If you are constantly overspending on a budget category, consider having an envelope system. Use the allocated cash from the envelop and stop spending once it runs out. It is the ultimate accountability strategy.

#5: CREATE GOALS

Be realistic when it comes to your budget and your priorities. Whether you are paying off student loans or building an emergency fund, you need to focus on the goal. Knowing the reasons behind why you are saving and why you are making sacrifices will help you sustain your budget.

#6: PROTECT YOUR WEALTH

Ensure that your hard-earned money does not vanish by taking some safety measures. IF you are renting a flat, consider getting an insurance to protect your belongings from fire or burglary. If you just bought a laptop, sign-up for the warranty. This will help you cushion the costs of repairs.

Image Credits: unsplash.com

You must educate yourself on budgeting and handling money. The more you learn about handling money wisely, the more concrete your reasons for budgeting will be. Good luck!

Sources: 1 & 2

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You Need To Know These 7 Job-Hunting Tips

Due to the global economic shifts brought by the pandemic, the unemployment rate in Singapore raised to around 4.38 percent in 2020. Unemployment has forced many Singaporean workers to reinvent themselves and pursue different career paths. It does not necessarily mean that they will try to get back the job they once lost.

If you are one of this people, you may turn to technology for advice. As you dive into the pool of job vacancies, you will encounter a massive wealth of job-hunting advice online. It is easy to get lost in the pile of articles found in Google. Avoid overwhelming yourself.

Let me start by cutting down the list of timeless job-hunting tips to help you survive this complex process.

#1: TAILOR YOUR APPLICATION

When applying for a job online, it is highly likely that your Curriculum Vitae (C.V.) or resume will be screened by an applicant tracking system. The first human encounter your C.V. will encounter is from a recruiter or an entry-level HR officer. It is best to tailor your application to the company you are applying for. Make it obvious that you are fit for the job!

Start by studying the job description and all the available information about the vacancy. Then, mirror the words and phrases found in the job description. Showcase your strengths in the areas that are important to the role being filled. Connect your skills to what they are looking for.

#2: CONSIDER FACE-TO-FACE JOB SEARCH

While most companies accomplish the initial hiring process online and thru Zoom interviews, you must not limit yourself to online applications. Accelerate your chances of getting the job by dropping by the office and handing over the application in person.

Schedule informational interviews with would-be peers, if possible. You may also approach the internal recruiter and ask a few questions. This will get you on their radar. Remember that decision makers usually interview people who were recommended or referred. Letting the company know your genuine interest can help you set yourself apart.

#3: DO YOUR RESEARCH

Always come prepared. Do your research on your target companies. Once you know what you want, it is time to find out what the companies want.

A great tip is to find out the company’s culture and structure through their LinkedIn page and website. Figure out what questions they commonly ask during job interviews and discover the approximate amount of salary you may get.

#4: CURATE YOUR ONLINE BRAND

It goes without saying that modern recruiters search through the Web to find out who you really are. It is best to build a brand that showcases your expertise and passion. Most recruiters use LinkedIn as their primary search tool. Use it to your advantage!

Moreover, you must be cautious about you post online. It can make or break your chances of getting the job.

#5: ORGANIZE YOURSELF

During the early stages of job-hunting, you must gather all the documents supporting your claims. This includes Transcript of Records and Recommendation Letters. Ensure that your C.V. and cover letter are up to date. Then, determine how many hours per day will be dedicated to job-hunting or networking.

You can neatly compile all the professional email accounts and job interview schedules into a spreadsheet. This way, your job search process can be faster and easier.

#6: ASK PEOPLE FOR ADVICE

During the end of your job interview, it does not hurt to become vulnerable. It is alright to ask your interviewer for advice on how to build strong working relationships and how to succeed in the current vacant position. Do not forget to admire their company and the work they do.

#7: NOTICE YOUR BODY LANGUAGE

Carry yourself well during interviews. How many times have you heard this: “body language is vital in job interviews”? It is in your interest to take this advice seriously. Watch out for your posture, gestures, and non-verbal cues. These may either exude confidence or incompetence.

Image Credits: unsplash.com

Communication, much like dancing, is a two-way street. Pay attention to your interviewer’s body language too. This will help you know if you are on the right track.

Sources: 1 & 2

 

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Foundations of bankruptcy in Singapore

petition for bankruptcy form

Bankruptcy is a big word, and some people fear it. But if one were to be familiar with its foundations, maybe it wouldn’t be that terrifying.

According to Investopedia, bankruptcy is a legal proceeding in which a debtor and a creditor resolve debts through the court system. The debtor has its debt resolved while the creditor obtains repayment based on the debtor’s available assets.

In Singapore, section 61 of the Bankruptcy Act states that debtors may be declared bankrupt when a debt has fallen due and is worth at least S$15,000.

For folks considering bankruptcy, here are the basics you should be aware of.

After declaring bankrupt

Once you are declared bankrupt, you gain exemption from your creditors’ legal actions intended to reclaim debt from you. A public servant called an Official Assignee (OA) would examine your financial capabilities and design a suitable repayment plan.

Think of it as your bankruptcy supervisor.

Your OA will ensure that you make monthly contributions on your road to being discharged. They will set up this monthly plan after evaluating your financial resources, income and credentials, household expenses, and the economy’s overall status.

Wave goodbye to your assets
car and private house

Image Credits: EdgeProp

During the bankruptcy proceedings, your OA will sell any assets you possess to pay off your creditors. This can include items from artworks to furniture and even sentimental gifts.

The OA will not sell off any “protected assets”, which include:

  • HDB flats if the owner is a Singaporean
  • Central Provident Fund (CPF) contributions
  • Life insurance policies if it benefits the bankrupt’s immediate family members
  • Compensation awarded legally due to personal injuries or wrongful acts against the bankrupt

While it may be tempting to hide or dispose of your possessions quietly, lying to your OA or evading the procedure on purpose can lead to fines of up to S$10,000 and/or up to 3 years in prison.

Not worth it, ladies and gentlemen.

Ready for restrictions on daily activities

Bankrupt persons in Singapore are subject to various duties and responsibilities. Gambling, travelling, seeking credit, or managing businesses while involved in bankruptcy proceedings can lead to monetary fines or jail time.

These restrictions exist to prevent bankrupts from exploiting corporate structures, concealing income, hiding assets, or generally cheating the system. However, the OA can ease or accommodate these restrictions.

Their willingness to do this is based on your level of cooperation. If you are engaged in the bankruptcy process and consistently settling your debts on time, the OA is more likely to view you as reliable and ease those limitations.

Especially so in the business realm, full cooperation, including the provision of requested documents promptly, is the single best strategy for getting those restraints lifted as soon as possible.

If you feel that the OA is not treating you fairly or is imposing ridiculous restrictions, the ideal course of action is to seek the court’s review. Simply ignoring the limits is likely to end with criminal charges against you.

Look forward to the discharge
bankruptcy documents in Singapore

Image Credits: The Straits Times

Bankruptcy is not forever. Eventually, your debts will be paid, and you will be discharged from them. However, a discharge is dependent on the fulfilment of specific conditions and approval from either the OA or the High Court. 

First-time bankrupts with debts of less than S$500,000 may be discharged after 3 to 7 years. For repeat offenders, it will take between five and nine years.

There is a well-known belief that a bankrupt is automatically released after three years, but this is not true. To speed up the process, cooperate fully with the OA and make sure you’re keeping up with your monthly repayment amount.

Bankrupts who have debts exceeding S$500,000 will need to apply to the High Court to seek an Order of Discharge. However, the courts will examine the interests of all involved parties before making a decision.

Noncompliance with the OA or any violation of behavioural restrictions will make the court reluctant to dismiss your bankruptcy.

Resume life after bankruptcy

Being discharged from bankruptcy is not necessarily a return to normal. At least not immediately. Depending on the circumstances of your bankruptcy, the courts may require you to entrust any new properties to the OA if debts remain after discharge.

Should the owed amount be repaid, bankruptcy can only be removed from your records after five years. If not, the bankruptcy status will remain in your public record permanently. Employers and creditors will have access to this information, so this should be a huge red flag for concern.

Final thoughts
Empty wallet

Image Credits: AsiaOne

Bankruptcy is not a walk in the park, but it is not the end of the world too. The Bankruptcy Act is designed to be fair to both debtors and creditors and focuses on providing rehabilitative measures to the bankrupt.

For the severely indebted, bankruptcy can provide a mechanism to help recover financial health and gain a second chance at life. Be sure to cooperate fully with the courts, and the OA and the law will likely give you more space to breathe.

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