Navigating the ‘we don’t want kids’ talk with parents & in-laws

pre-wedding shoot

So you just got married and your parents and in-laws are asking you, “When are you going to give us grandchildren ah?”

You and your spouse quietly exchange a look and think, “Err… never ever.”

Yes, this kind of conversation is awkward.

You may be tempted to say “Aiya, we don’t want kids lah, don’t ask us anymore.”

But the older generations might think that you’re being selfish. So how can you be tactful and respectful, and at the same time explain your reasons?

Keep reading.

Preparing & initiating the conversation

If you and your spouse don’t want to have kids, it’s not a long-term solution to just keep quiet/avoid the topic altogether.

First, you need to reflect on why you don’t want children. Maybe you want to focus on your career, or you have health concerns, or you just don’t feel ready. Whatever it is, make sure you and your spouse are on the same page and can explain your reasons clearly.

Next, anticipate what kind of questions or objections your parents and in-laws might have. They might say things like “But who will take care of you when you’re old?” or “Don’t you want to continue the family line?” Prepare your answers so you don’t get caught off guard.

Lastly, choose a good time and place to have the conversation. Don’t just blurt it out during a family dinner or when they’re in a bad mood. Maybe suggest going to a quiet cafe or having a private chat at home. Remember to be respectful but firm in your decision.

Stay focused on your reasons

Share with them your own beliefs and motivations.

Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty or ashamed for not wanting kids.

Also, some people think that if you don’t have kids, then you must be selfish and will end up lonely when you age.

But that’s not true at all. You can still have a fulfilling life without kids, and focus on your mental, relationship, and financial stability.

couple camping with their dog

Image Credits: unsplash.com

So, don’t be afraid to stand up for your decision. Just be respectful and understanding, and help them see that being child-free can be a positive choice.

Addressing concerns and objections

Talking to parents and in-laws about not wanting to have kids is like walking on eggshells but it’s good to address concerns and objections.

Don’t say “Aiyah, you old school lah”, but instead say “I know that having grandchildren is important to you, but…”

Then, share that this decision is the best for you and your partner and that you’ve had a serious talk about it before coming to a decision.

Talking about “we don’t want kids” with parents and in-laws can be taboo but sometimes, we need to be honest with our feelings and circumstances. Maybe they will ask why or try to convince you otherwise, but just stand firm and explain your reasons. There’s no need to argue or fight, just listen and respect each other’s preferences. At the end of the day, it’s your life and your decision. Don’t let other people pressure you into something you don’t want and then regret it later.

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4 noise-canceling earbuds from $155 to block out distracting background noise

man with earbuds

Are you tired of being constantly interrupted by the noise around you?

Me too.

Therefore, allow me to introduce you to some of the best noise-canceling earbuds designed to help you reclaim your focus and enjoy a serene audio experience.

Whether you’re trying to concentrate on work, tune out the chatter during your daily commute, or simply unwind with your favorite music, I’ve got you covered.

Stay on this page to find the ideal noise-canceling earbuds that will transform the way you listen and eliminate those pesky distractions.

JBL Tune 130NC TWS

JBL Tune 130NC TWS

Price: $155

Put an end to audio annoyances with the JBL Tune 130NC TWS wireless earbuds.

Their Active Noise Canceling tech instantly eliminates ambient rackets so you can enjoy your music in peace. But when you need to tune in to the outside world, Ambient Aware mode amplifies your surroundings at the touch of a button. TalkThru does the same, pausing your audio so you can engage in a short chat without removing your earbuds.

The ergonomic design of these lightweight earbuds ensures all-day comfort, while personalized sound settings let you tweak the audio to match your preferences. The only thing you will want to cancel is your plans so you can keep listening all day (and all night) long.

CX Plus True Wireless

CX Plus True Wireless

Price: $179 (was $259)

Your soundtrack for life just got an upgrade. These sleek, ergonomic wireless earbuds deliver sound so rich and full-bodied, you will wonder how you’d lived without it.

Their Active Noise Cancelation blocks out the world, while Transparent Hearing keeps you aware of your surroundings when you want it. With an unbelievable 24 hours of playtime, you can soundtrack your whole day. Rain won’t put a damper on your listening either thanks to their IPX4 water resistance feature.

Whether you’re working, exercising or just enjoying some well-deserved downtime, these earbuds provide a premium listening experience that’s second to none.

Elite 85t

Elite 85t

Price: $228 (was 352)

Silence the world around you—or let the right parts in. The Elite 85t True Wireless Earbuds give you full control over what you hear.

With adjustable Active Noise Cancelation, these earbuds cancel out unwanted noise so you can focus on your music, podcast, or call. But when you want to stay aware of your surroundings, HearThrough mode uses microphones to let in ambient sound.

The 85t aren’t just smart—they’re comfortable too. An ergonomic semi-open design with built-in pressure relief prevents that plugged-up feeling, while a variety of ear tips ensure a custom fit.

Make the world sound the way you want with the Elite 85t.

WF-1000XM4 Wireless Noise Cancelling Headphones

WF-1000XM4

Price: $383

Sony’s award-winning WF-1000XM4 wireless earbuds are powered by an all-new Integrated Processor V1, canceling more noise than ever so you can immerse yourself in rich, layered audio bliss.

Featuring Sony’s renowned high-resolution sound and innovative noise isolation earbud tips for a secure fit, the WF-1000XM4 lets your favorite artists sound better than in real life. Take calls on the go with advanced microphones that pick up your voice and filter out background noise for conversations so clear you will forget you’re not face to face.

When life feels chaotic, these earbuds bring calm through their unparalleled noise cancelation. After all, who says you have to sacrifice silence to stay connected? Not Sony. And certainly not these groundbreaking earbuds.

Noise-canceling earbuds can truly make a difference when it comes to blocking out distracting background noise and enhancing your audio experience. I hope this short post has provided you with valuable insights into 4 exceptional options ranging from $155 to under $400, catering to various budgets and preferences. So go ahead, invest in a pair that suits your needs, and enjoy the newfound tranquility that these earbuds bring. Say goodbye to distractions and hello to a more focused, enjoyable listening experience for both work and play.

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Can you pursue a career in HR if you’re an introvert?

asian woman drinking coffee while working in a cafe

Why not?

You may have heard from people that introverts can’t work in HR. But that’s not entirely true. In my opinion, you don’t have to be extremely extroverted or talkative to excel in the job.

In fact, being introverted can even be an advantage for you in HR. More so if you’re empathetic and a good listener to people’s problems. But of course, you need to know how to communicate and build relationships as well.

Understanding introversion

There’s no need to feel like you CMI in HR just because you’re not as outgoing as others.

That’s because being an introvert doesn’t necessarily mean you’re anti-social, right?

Introversion just means you prefer to recharge by yourself, and maybe you don’t talk too much. But that doesn’t mean you cannot communicate or dislike working with people.

Most introverts also possess practical skills like attention to detail, critical thinking, and compassion. These are all useful traits to survive in the HR world.

P.S. Just find a company that values your strengths and doesn’t force you to be someone you’re not.

Key HR job responsibilities and how introverts can excel

Recruitment, training, employee relations, and performance management are some job responsibilities of a career in HR.

Recruitment: Introverts are good at analyzing people and can use their attention to detail to screen candidates.

young-asian-businessman-job-interview-with-woman

Image Credits: Freepik

Training: Look into offering one-on-one personalized coaching and mentoring.

Employee relations: Employ active listening and empathy to your advantage. Mediate conflicts and resolve issues in a calm and composed manner that extroverts may find hard to do.

Performance management: Assess employee performance objectively and deliver 1-to-1 constructive and tactful feedback.

Strategies for introverted HR-wannabes to thrive

First, cultivate your communication skills.

Learn to express yourself clearly and effectively, and also listen when listening is due.

If you’re shy, practice asking questions first and then listening to those answers. There’s no need to force yourself to be talkative right from the get-go; just communicate in your way.

Stan Bowman, an HR manager, uses observation skills to learn about people’s interests.

“My goal always is to find a common ground. Once we establish that, we have a connected conversation that’s of value to both of us.”

Next, balance social interactions with alone time.

As an introvert, you need the space to recharge and think, so don’t push yourself too much and burn out. Schedule quiet time in your workday, or request to work from home sometimes.

As Karen Gately, a people management specialist, rightly puts it:

“For most introverts, it’s critical to have focus times to work through priorities. Introverts don’t enjoy unanticipated interruptions, for example, to the same extent that extroverts do.”

And remember, growth and adaptation are important in any job.

So don’t be afraid to challenge yourself and try new things. Push out of your comfort zone once you’re more settled in the job and discover your hidden strengths.

Just because you’re quieter doesn’t mean you’re not capable of handling people. You can be the one who makes sure everyone’s happy in the workplace without talking too much. In a world where everyone wants a “voice,” being in an opposite position can do more good than harm. But if you’re feeling unsure, that’s normal. No one’s immediately good at a new job, so give yourself time to develop your communication skills. There’s no need to be so gung ho; take one step at a time, yeah.

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7 Last-Minute Father’s Day Gifts Under S$45

Finding the perfect gift for Dad can be a real challenge, especially when he insists, he wants nothing. Although your dad claims he needs nothing, he’ll never turn down the opportunity to spend quality time with you. So, here are some fun ideas to make Father’s Day special!

Don’t forget, Father’s Day is tomorrow – June 18.

#1: WRAPPED CHOCOLATES

What better gift for a father who loves indulging in chocolates? Hello Chocolate offers a delightful collection of Father’s Day gift sets featuring chocolates from around the world. You can choose from the “Chocolate Gift Creator”, which allows you to handpick the chocolates for the gift, or the “For the Best Dad” set that includes alcohol-infused chocolates. And if you feel tempted to order a set for yourself on the side, we completely understand. The price starts at $17.

Buy it here: hellochocolate.asia

#2: PERSONALIZED CUSHIONS

Does your dad love to relax after a long day? Make this day even more special by conveying your heartfelt love for your dad with a personalized cushion, starting from just $42.00. This thoughtful gift is sure to bring a smile to his face and let him know how much he means to you.

Buy it here: fnp.sg

Image Credits: unsplash.com

#3: FRESH WORKOUT CLOTHES

If you’re thinking about getting your dad a fresh set of workout outfits, you don’t have to search far! Decathlon Singapore is the place to go, offering a fantastic selection of affordable yet top-notch options that are just right for him. Surprise your dad with the DOMYOS Men’s Fitness Eco-Friendly Shorts and KALENJI Men’s Running T-Shirt, both priced under $50. These choices are not only comfortable and lightweight but also designed to elevate his workout experience to a whole new level. He’ll appreciate the effort you put into finding him the perfect exercise gear.

Buy these here:www.decathlon.sg

#4: BOOK ABOUT COFFEE

Written by World Barista Champion James Hoffmann, The World Atlas of Coffee takes you on an incredible journey through the world of coffee, from the humble bean to the perfect brew. Priced at $37.80, this book is a coffee lover’s dream come true. With detailed insights into coffee production in over 35 countries and beautifully illustrated pages, it’s not only an informative read but also a stunning addition to any coffee table. If your dad is a coffee geek, this book is an absolute gem that he’ll truly love. It’s the perfect gift to support his passion for all things coffee.

Buy it here: singapore.kinokuniya.com

#5: INTELLIGENT TRACKER

Baseus, renowned for their power banks, doesn’t disappoint in the gadget department with their T2 Mini Intelligent Bluetooth tracker. What’s more? It’s lightweight at a mere 5g. And here’s a neat trick: when the battery runs low, simply pop open the case and replace it with a CR2032 battery that you can easily find at minimarts.

For under S$12, it’s a handy little tool for tagging all your precious knick-knacks. Android users can pair up to 4 Intelligent T2 trackers using the Baseus Smart app, while iPhone users can link up to 6. With this tracker, your dad will never lose track of his belongings again!

Buy it here: lazada.sg

#6: DELICIOUS CHEESE

Whether you’re planning a Father’s Day lunch at home or a picnic outdoors, here’s an idea to make it extra special – assemble a board filled with delicious cheese and charcuterie. And for a truly indulgent treat, why not include this exquisite truffle-infused brie imported directly from France? It boasts a rich and creamy texture, complemented by its distinctive earthy and mushroom flavors. The best part? You can get this gourmet delight for just $17.00. It’s a delightful addition to any Father’s Day celebration!

Buy it here: littlefarms.com

#7: COVETED TICKETS TO BREWNANZA FEST

Get ready to be blown away with your father at the ultimate beer event, the Brewnanza Fest by Brewlander. This vibrant festival brings together over 20 of the most innovative craft breweries from America, Asia, Australia, Europe, and United Kingdom. From August 3rd to 6th, 2023, the Bayfront Event Space will be transformed into a buzzing hub of excitement. Get ready to indulge in an expertly curated selection of over 100 unique beers, including never-seen-before brews crafted by renowned international breweries.

Image Credits: facebook.com/brewlander

But that’s not all! Your ticket to this incredible event includes a complimentary beer redemption, allowing you to savor the flavors of your choice. Don’t miss out on this unforgettable experience and secure your early bird tickets now, priced at just $25.

Buy it here: brewlander.com

Sources: 1 & 2

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6 Things That Make a Co-Worker Feel Furious with You

In the realm of Psychology, vivid nightmares can hold symbolic meaning. Recently, my uncle shared a distressing dream in which a collapsing mountain caused panic among people. Curious about its significance, he sought my help to analyze it. Surprisingly, this type of dream often serves as a warning, urging the dreamer to break free from detrimental habits and start anew. Reflecting on this, I realized how negative habits and behaviors in the workplace can hinder our careers.

Being a bad co-worker extends beyond mere annoyance; it can detrimentally impact one’s professional trajectory. However, the good news is that worst co-workers aren’t inherently evil and can be effectively addressed, according to Jody Foster, an associate professor of psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania.

Let’s examine 6 common behaviors that can ignite fury among co-workers. By striving for self-improvement and actively addressing these habits, we can foster a more harmonious work environment.

#1: YOU MANIPULATE OTHERS

Initially, you may boost someone’s ego or compliment others, just like friends do. However, over time, you may begin to manipulate others or openly display mean behavior. This type of behavior can harm relationships among your co-workers.

#2: BEING A NARCISSIST

Are you a narcissist? Signs of narcissistic behavior include exaggerating accomplishments, blaming others for your shortcomings, interrupting others, taking credit for other people’s work, and lashing out when questioned. If you are one, you should try to step back and maintain a good relationship with your co-workers without compromising your integrity.

#3: YOU ARE A SLOTH

Whether you call yourself lazy or a slacker, you complete your work, but only just enough to get by, and you thrive on doing the bare minimum. Working slowly may work to your favor, but this behavior becomes frustrating to your co-workers, especially if your team’s success relies on it.

#4: BEING AN INTERRUPTER

You consistently interrupt your co-workers, bosses, or other professionals, and this is annoying. If you interrupt others because you feel it is the only way to be heard, you should consider having a conversation with your boss to establish healthier communication habits. This way, you won’t have to resort to cutting off others to express your ideas.

#5: YOU ARE A GOSSIPER

While there’s such a thing as harmless office gossip, it can sometimes go too far. You talk behind others’ backs and spread unverified rumors. Anyone who remembers high school knows how this behavior can cause harm. Put-downs and gossip have no place in the workplace.

#6: YOU ARRIVE LATE

Everyone experiences delays or occasionally needs to leave early for important obligations. However, consistently arriving late or leaving early will eventually lead to the perception that you are not truly committed to your job or employer. This can result in a negative view of your workplace ethics, and you may end up missing important meetings or company updates because you are not as involved.

Furthermore, being constantly engrossed in your mobile phone can signal disengagement and distraction, especially during meetings or conferences. Such behavior is not considered good workplace ethics.

Image Credits: unsplash.com

Remember that nobody is perfect. Success in your job doesn’t mean you can never make a mistake. The best professionals take their mistakes, analyze them, learn from them, and strive to grow and improve as a result.

Sources: 1 & 2

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