Why reframing your negative thoughts is the key to happiness

an Asian woman against a backlight

Negative thoughts and sentiments are a part of life. But, if left unchecked, they can have a weighty impact on our well-being and relationships.

Thankfully, there’s an uncomplicated way to deal with negative thoughts: reframing. Reframing is the process of viewing a negative situation in a more positive light.

In this post, you will learn about reframing, why it’s so important, and how to do it.

What are negative thoughts?

Negative thoughts are any thoughts that induce feelings of anger, anxiety, or sadness. They can be about others, yourself, or the world in general. These thoughts are often intrusive and can be challenging to get rid of.

They might tell you that you’re not good enough, that you’re going to fail, or that the world is a dangerous place. If you tend to think negatively, it can be tough to be happy. But there is good news: you can train your brain to alter these thoughts into being more favorable.

Why do we have negative thoughts?

Our brains are wired to focus on the negative. It’s a survival mechanism that helped our ancestors stay safe by identifying potential threats. However, in the modern world, this mechanism can often do more harm than good.

Negative thoughts can spiral out of control and cause us a lot of pain. They can also keep us from reaching our full potential. That’s why it’s so critical to learn how to rewire them. There are many ways to do this, and it’s not at all complex. By developing a more optimistic mindset, you can discover how to be more content with your life.

How to reframe your negative thoughts
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Image Credits: unsplash.com

Now that you understand a little more about why reframing your negative thoughts is so crucial, let’s take a look at some specific ways that you can do it.

The first step is to become aware of when you’re having negative thoughts. This might be tricky at first, but with time and practice, you will start to notice the patterns of negative thinking that are most common for you.

Once you’re conscious of your pessimistic views, the next step is to challenge them. This means questioning the validity of your thoughts and looking for evidence that disproves them. For example, if you think “I’m not good enough,” ask yourself “Where did I get this idea?” and “What proof do I have that supports this thought?”

Finally, once you’ve contested your negative thoughts, it’s time to reframe them. This means replacing the negative thought with a more positive one. For instance, if you’ve challenged the thought “I’m not good enough,” you can rephrase it to “I am doing my best and that’s adequate for me.”

The benefits of reframing your negative thoughts

There are countless benefits to be gained from changing your perspective on negative thoughts. When you learn how to modify the way you think, you will start to see a dramatic change in your overall happiness status.

Some of the key benefits of reframing your negative thoughts include:

  • Better sleep quality
  • Increased resilience
  • Boosted productivity
  • Reduced stress levels
  • Improved mental health
Bonus tips for reframing your negative thoughts

So now you know the fundamentals of reframing your negative thoughts. But there are a few bonus tips that can make the process a little more manageable:

  • Be patient. It takes time to retrain your brain, so don’t expect to see results instantly. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and your thought patterns won’t change overnight either.
  • Practice self-compassion. When you inevitably have a negative thought, don’t beat yourself up about it! Accept that it’s normal to have negative thoughts sometimes, and forgive yourself.
  • Seek help if needed. If you find that reframing your thoughts is too tricky on your own, pursue support from a therapist or counselor. They can provide additional aid and guidance as you work to adjust your thought routines.

So, why reframe your negative thoughts? It’s simple: because when you don’t, they have a stranglehold on your happiness. They keep you from seeing the good in circumstances, from appreciating the present, and from living a joyful life. But when you do reframe them, you’re suddenly free, unrestrained to see the flip side of a coin, relish in the moments, and live an all-around more satisfying life.

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Tips to stay frugal during retirement

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Retirement may make it tricky to adjust to life in general, notably if you have always been on a tight budget.

You don’t automatically have to stop paying your bills and keep up with house maintenance just because you’ve entered the next phase of life. In fact, it’s more crucial now than ever to allocate additional expenses for outings to the country club or for relaxing holidays.

Now’s the perfect time to employ your knowledge in personal finance if you’re thinking of retiring! Here are several tips to help you stay frugal during your golden years.

Define your goals and budget

First, you need to define your goals and budget. What do you hope to achieve in retirement, and how much money do you need to make that happen? Once you have a firmer idea of what you’re working with, you can start brainstorming ways to save.

Next, take a look at your regular expenses and see where you could cut back. Maybe you don’t need that expensive subscription plan anymore, or maybe you can start brown-bagging your lunch instead of eating out every day. Paring down your expenses will free up more money to save for retirement.

Bonus advice: One of the smartest things you can do for your retirement savings is to invest them. Investing allows your money to grow over time, so you can comfortably retire without having to worry about finances. There are many diverse types of investments available, though, so talk to a financial advisor to figure out which one is best for you.

Invest in quality over the price tag

When it comes to spending your money during retirement, it’s essential to invest in quality over the price tag. Sure, you may be able to save a little bit of money by buying the cheapest version of something, but in the long run, you will be much better off if you spend a little bit more and purchase something that’s going to last.

For illustration, instead of buying the most inexpensive watch available, invest in a quality timepiece that will last for years. Likewise, rather than opting for the most affordable clothing options, choose well-made pieces that will resist wear and tear. By spending a little bit more upfront, you will avoid having to constantly replace items and will be able to stick to your budget much more efficiently.

Seek free or relatively low-cost activities
elderly playing chess

Image Credits: lionraw.com

When you retire, it’s important to find ways to stretch your dollar. One way to do this is by seeking free or low-cost activities. There are several things you can do to keep costs down.

For example, you can take complimentary online courses, visit museum exhibitions with free admission or participate in meetups and group activities. You can also save money by cooking at home and avoiding expensive restaurants. Whatever you do, make sure that you’re budgeting wisely and that your retirement expenses don’t put too much stress on your budget. Retirement should be a time of joy and relaxation, not financial worry.

Get creative with your living situation

One way to save money during retirement is to get clever with your living situation. For instance, consider downsizing to a smaller home or moving to a less expensive neighborhood. You could also consider sharing a home with a friend or family member or renting out a room in your house.

Another way to save money is to be mindful of your spending habits. Try to avoid buying unnecessary items and be conscious of the things you do spend money on. There are many ways to be economical without having to deprive yourself of the things you enjoy. It just takes a little bit of restraint and inventiveness.

Learn to cook and enjoy meals at home
Singapore supermarket

Image Credits: straitstimes.com

One of the wisest things you can do to save money during retirement is to learn to cook and savor meals at home. Not only will you save a ton of money on delivery food, but you will also have the satisfaction of knowing that you made your meal from scratch. Here are a few suggestions to help get you started:

  • Try no-frills recipes that are effortless to follow and don’t require a lot of ingredients.
  • Browse cooking blogs for inspiration, or take a cooking class at your nearest community center or a cooking school.
  • Invest in some quality kitchen utensils and equipment. A fast blender, for example, will make cooking much more pleasurable.
  • Be creative and experiment with distinct flavors and ingredients. You might be pleasantly surprised at what you can come up with!

Being thrifty and living within your means is more paramount now than ever when you’re retired. But keep in mind that a thrifty way of living values conserving money as effectively as possible and is cost mindful. It’s critical to assess your financial situation in retirement and determine whether being frugal is a good match. It should not be thought of as a punishment to be thrifty since it can be financially empowering in the long run. Strive to maintain your retired lifestyle while keeping within your budget by considering the advice provided in this article.

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Things you should do when updating your resume

a blank resume beside a laptop

You’ve put in the hard work to update your resume and have made sure it’s typo-free, well-organized, and tailored to the job you’re applying for.

But before you hit send, ensure you’re not making any of these common mistakes. Avoiding these blunders will help guarantee your resume is seen in the best light possible.

Use colors sparingly

Don’t use too many different colors on your resume. Stick to two or three colors at the most, and use different shades of the same color. This will make your resume look neater and more professional.

Avoid outdated language

Don’t use outdated language in your resume. It will make you look like you’re not keeping up with the times. Bypass terms like “hard worker” and “team player.” These phrases have been used so often that they’ve lost their meaning. Instead, try talking about your specific skills and accomplishments throughout your career.

Choose readable fonts and sizes
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Image Credits: resumegenius.com

When it comes to fonts, it’s best to stick to something simple and easy-to-read like Arial or Times New Roman. You also want to avoid using too many dissimilar fonts in your resume, as this can be confusing for the reader. As for font size, 10 or 11 is a suitable size to use. Anything smaller and your resume may start to look too cramped, while anything larger may make it difficult to read.

Don’t make it too short or too long

One of the most typical mistakes people make when updating their resumes is to make them either too short or too long. Remember, your resume is not a biography! A good rule of thumb is to keep it to one page if you can, and two pages at most.

If your resume is too short, you may not be giving hiring managers a complete picture of your skills and experience. On the other hand, if your resume is too long, you may be overwhelming hiring managers and they may not bother to read it at all. Keep it concise and relevant, and you will be on your way to making the best impression.

Steer away from an unprofessional email address

One of the biggest no-nos when updating your resume is using an unprofessional email address. This will give the image that you’re not serious about your job search. We’re referring to email addresses such as sexylady@gmail.com or drunkendaddy@yahoo.com.sg.

There are a few straightforward steps you can take to make sure your email address is professional. First, choose an email address that’s easy to remember and doesn’t include any weird characters. Secondly, make sure it’s not too long—the shorter, the better. Finally, avoid using any funky spellings or unusual words.

Your resume is the first impression you make on potential employers, so it’s crucial to make sure it’s up-to-date and error-free. But there are some things you should never do when updating your resume, like using too many colors or including irrelevant information. Follow some of the abovementioned approaches and you will be on your way to constructing a resume that stands out from the rest.

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Ways to become more extroverted if you’re an introvert

an introvert in a meeting

If you’re an introvert, you may sometimes feel like you’re at a disadvantage when it comes to networking and socializing. You may find it tricky to make small talk or be the life of the party.

But fret not, introverts. There are plenty of ways to become more extroverted if that’s what you want to be. In this post, we will outline a few strategies that have worked for us and other introverts.

Be more assertive

Don’t be afraid to speak up and express your opinion. When you’re at a meeting or social event, make sure to participate and be engaged. You don’t have to be the star of the squad, but by being bold, you will find it easier to get comfortable in social situations.

Sign up for social events

One of the best ways to become more extroverted is by seeking out social events that interest you. If you’re a bookworm, find book clubs or reading meet-ups in your area. If you like to dance, look for local dance classes or group dance occasions. The more you immerse yourself in activities that make you merry, the more painless it will be to become outgoing and less introverted.

Stop being too apologetic
an introvert trying to speak up

Image Credits: forbes.com

You might be saying sorry all the time because you’re afraid of speaking up. Afraid of being wrong, of standing out, or of making a silly mistake. But the more you say sorry, the more you find yourself disappearing.

You can start by raising your voice a little bit, taking up more space, and making more eye contact. You can also challenge yourself to speak up in meetings or ask questions in seminars. Just be mindful to start small and don’t be too hard on yourself.

Get comfortable with small talk

Learn how to be at ease with small talk. Small talk is just that—small talk. It can be pointless chatter about the weather or what you had for dinner last night, but it’s a fantastic way to practice speaking in public and getting used to socializing.

The more you practice, the more relaxed you will become. Start by engaging in small talk with the cashier at the supermarket, or striking up a conversation with the Starbucks barista during teatime. Soon, you will find that small talk comes naturally to you, and you will be ready to take on bigger and more daring social challenges.

Being an introvert is not a bad thing, but under some circumstances, you might prefer to switch to an outgoing personality. Consider social situations as practice, provided you have time to recover in between. Your social endurance will grow with time, and you could even develop a more extroverted, outspoken personality. Try it and see the difference for yourself!

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Tips for handling a colleague who loves to gossip

colleagues gossiping in the office

You’ve probably encountered at least one colleague in your career who just can’t resist gossiping. 

This person might be a constant thorn in your sight or simply an annoyance that you have to put up with from time to time. Whichever category this colleague falls into, it’s important to know how to deal with them effectively.

Here are some tips for handling a colleague who loves to gossip.

Set boundaries

Don’t be afraid to tell them that you don’t want to talk about personal matters of others, and walk away if the conversation gets too uncomfortable. It’s also worth noting that you don’t have to justify your behavior to them—just because they gossip doesn’t mean you have to.

Use “I” statements

When dealing with a colleague who loves to gossip, it can be tough to stay calm. But by using “I” statements, you can avoid getting drawn into their drama. For example, you could say, “I feel uneasy when you talk about our teammates behind their backs. It makes me feel like I can’t count on you.” By spotlighting your feelings, rather than slamming the other person, you’re less likely to initiate an argument.

Be honest but diplomatic
colleagues conversing

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You might be feeling frustrated with your coworker who loves to gossip. But before you react rashly, convince yourself to stay composed. Here are a few tips for handling the situation:

  • Let your colleague know that you’re uncomfortable gossiping and ask them to stop.
  • If they don’t listen, try to avoid them or limit the amount of time you spend around them.
  • Keep your emotions in check. Responding with rage or frustration will only make the situation worse.
  • If things get too heated, take a break and walk away for a few minutes. This will give you a chance to settle down and approach the situation more rationally.
Avoid getting sucked into the gossip

It can be challenging to work with a colleague who adores gossiping, but it’s vital to stay neutral and dodge getting sucked into the drama. Here’s how you can manage the case:

  • Stay courteous. It’s wise to remain professional, even if the person is being rude or disrespectful.
  • Keep your distance. It might be best to avoid them as much as possible, especially if they tend to be toxic or negative.
  • Avoid sharing any personal information. The last thing you want is for them to use your information against you later on.
  • Keep conversations short and polite. Try not to engage in long conversations with the gossiper, as it will only encourage them further.
  • Remember that you’re not alone. There are probably other people in your workplace who are also frustrated with the gossiper. Seek out their support and build a network of allies.

Work days can be difficult when you have to deal with a colleague who loves to gossip. They always seem to be stirring up trouble and making office life more complex than it needs to be. But don’t worry, there are ways to address them as we’ve listed in this article. If all else fails, schedule a meeting with your HR manager or your direct supervisor to discuss the issue.

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