Most parents will agree that being a mom or dad is one of the most amazing and important tasks that we have to perform in life. A lot of smart and useful books are dedicated to this topic, explaining every nuance of upbringing children. But there are several important secrets of this process that you will never find on the pages of books. They will help you not only to educate your children properly but also to get mutual pleasure from it.
- All parents lose patience sometimes
Being a parent means doing a lot of emotional, mental, and sometimes physical work. Not always your efforts will be evaluated, and you won’t see instant feedback from them. Sometimes, on the contrary, we encounter such fierce resistance that we are ready to give up. Therefore, it is quite natural sometimes that there is a desire to get mad and set your emotions free. Do not hold back and throw everything that has accumulated at your kids. If you don’t do that, the consequences will be much worse.
- The parents buy the newest and most expensive toys for themselves first of all
Up to a certain age, a child is generally careless about the price of the toy. Children may substitute a toy with a plastic bowl, paper cups, and chestnuts. It is important to teach a daughter or son to enjoy simple things than to injure their psyche by numbers on a price tag.
- You have the right to anger
Many parents, especially young people, believe that under any circumstances, they should love their child and show this love in every possible way. This is not true. Sometimes children turn into real monsters. Of course, you should hold back your desire to hand them over to the orphanage immediately because of this, but you need to show your real feelings.
- Your ‘no’ will not kill them
Each child must have clearly defined boundaries. And your clear and firm ‘no’ serves to define them. They will sulk and cry, make scenes, or pretend that they accepted your refusal, but no tricks should mislead you and force you to solve what you consider harmful, dangerous or just stupid.
- Children should have time for independence
If you constantly take care of your child, then it’s ridiculous to demand independence and self-sufficiency from them. Constant assistance prevents the emergence of the ability to overcome difficulties and develop creativity. Therefore, be sure to leave the children alone intentionally so that they can find a job and entertain themselves without help.
- You have the right to rest
No matter how important the task of upbringing children is, you can get tired of it too. Let your children read, paint, and play with toys, while you calmly relax, meditate or just watch TV. Let them know that your time is inviolable and cannot be interrupted by their screams or other stuff.
- Proper nutrition starts from an early age
Many parents, especially grandmothers, have completely wild ideas about child nutrition. Yes, it has its own characteristics, but this does not mean that the child needs to be fed with chips, pies, and ice cream. Very often, you can see a picture when parents try to stick to some restrictions in nutrition, and their children are fed all the advertised muck, justifying it with words, like “This stuff won’t do any harm to you while you’re young.” This is absolutely unacceptable.
- You should have your own entertainment
Being a parent is not a punishment. This does not mean that you have to give up your personal life and completely dissolve in upbringing and care. If you go to a movie theater, club, to visit friends, or to the stadium without your kids, this doesn’t instantly make you a bad dad or mom! Just keep a reasonable balance.
- The upbringing of children can be terribly difficult and a damn pleasant experience at the same time.
Within one day or one hour, you will be able to fall several times in the abyss of disappointment and rise to heaven of exultation. You can experience a surge of severe anger with an interval of 10 minutes, which immediately will be replaced by tears. These are perfectly normal emotions that all normal parents experience. If you feel that you are not coping with this, and your reactions become too acute, then it’s time to seek help and take a small (or big) timeout. If you continue to violate yourself and your psyche, it can hurt not only you but your child.
- You will always compare your child, and the result will always be the same
Your child is excellent. It is the fastest, smartest, cleverest, and quick-witted. And if someone doubts this, they’re obviously just jealous. And, you know, you’re absolutely right about that.
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